Words by Stuart McGuckin
Sometimes the most amazing and the most curious of things turn out to be true. Other times they turn out to be nothing more than a mere fabrication; a lie. Perhaps they are just a little white lie or perhaps they are a lies conceived out of malice and ill-content. They can be trickery or treachery.
This story is not one of those times.
This story is all true and not a word of it a lie. At times it may seem to border on the unfathomable and it cannot be denied that even some of those who witnessed the events that I’m about to tell you thought that they might themselves be going insane. But I solemnly swear that every event and every circumstance in this tale, however far-fetched it may seem, is one hundred percent fact and would withstand a cross-examination in a court of law, and in fact it did once in the small south western town of Denmark, but that is not the story that you are about to be told; that is for another day.
So, without any further ado and fanfare let us begin at the start.
But, before we do let us first take a moment to stop and check ourselves at the door. You are best not to bring your baggage with you into this tale for it will only hold you back. It is a long adventure, your baggage is heavy, your back will end up sore and then upon your return you will have to spend time and money trying to fix your back. You’ll see a physiotherapist, or maybe a chiropractor, and they’ll tell you to do some stretches, rest and then come back next week or in a couple of days; and maybe also to drink plenty of water. You might not be able to work for a while; you’ll be laid up at home doing nothing. Sure that sounds okay now but give it a week or two and you’ll have no money, remember you’ve just spent all of your savings on a long adventure, and you’ll be bored because you’ve finished doing all the chores you’ve put off for a year.
Trust me in order to save yourself in the long run you are going to want to check your baggage at the door before we begin. Just go ahead and put it down over there and you can pick it up when we get back. And now make your way to the lounge, sit down, put your feet up and open your mind.
Now we start.